Yustina is Walking in a Winter Wonderland
by District9forEvs
Summary: Yustina is an ordinary girl living in District 9 with her Maw, when she is pulled into the Hunger Games with her boyfriend, Tokyo. WARNING- Contains cannibalism, sex, violence, incest, bodily functions, food, abuse, beastiality, bad language, racism, necrophilia, sexism, bullies, alcohol, nudity, a torture scene, evil nuns, lying parents, drugs and tragedy. Rated T.
1. Chapter 1- My Name is Yustina

I was walking to school the day my life changed. I had a test that day, and I had to keep going over the information I'd learnt the night before.

_Bagels are savoury, doughnuts are sweet_, I thought, over and over again. I live in the district of Panem responsible for grain and bread-making, but I still got confused between bagels and doughnuts.

My mother is a bitch. She says if I don't work harder, I will never get a good job. I think I will just move to the Capitol and marry a rich man, but she says no rich man in the Capitol would ever marry some bread-girl from District 9. We are sort of a laughing stock in Panem, because we are one of the few districts with an obesity crisis. I know they are starving in some districts, but we have so much bread and cake here, it's difficult not to eat and eat.

I was a bit resentful about even heading to school, because it was the day they would call out the tributes for the Hunger Games, and I know in other districts all the kids get the day off. It was not fair. I wanted the day off. We only got a half-day, and even though it is always great, I wanted more. I hate school, and I had made plans to go joyriding with my best friend Sonya, who had just gotten a car for her sixteenth birthday. The day they pull out the names of the tributes is always a great day, because I love half-days. I know my name might be pulled out and all, but what are the chances, seriously?

As you may have guessed, they were actually very good.

When I got to school, I saw my boyfriend, Tokyo. I am in love with Tokyo, I swear to God, he is the best looking man you've ever bleeding seen. I would just do him all day long, but the teachers would give out to me if I did.

"Hey Tokyo," I said.

"Hey Yustina," he said, and we started kissing each other.

Then I heard my teacher's stupid voice, moaning at me. "Stop that behaviour right now!" she said. "You have a test in three minutes! And if you fail it, you have no hope of ever making it in District 9!"

I rolled my eyes and stopped kissing Tokyo. "I'm COMING," I said, being really cheeky.

My teacher is basically a nun, she's also a big moanbag and a slut. Also, by the way, Tokyo is not Japanese, he is Chuvash like me and everyone else in District 9.

"Get into the classroom now," said my teacher, and I went in. I took out my pencil and my crayons and my teacher began handing out the tests.

When I got mine, I almost cried. I knew nothing.

What the fucking hell was cesnica? And puri? And brown bread?

I looked around the class. Everyone else was writing, really, really fast. They obviously knew what this stuff was.

I looked down at the paper again, and I laughed. There was this bread called pumpernickel on the page, and it was very funny, because it sounds like it should be a bit rude, like it's really another word for a willy, and not a bread. I remembered everything about it though, which was lucky. I remembered it because I'd laughed when I heard the name in class too. It's a leavened bread, from Eastern and Central Europe.

Everyone stared at me, and I saw my teacher was very angry. "Yustina! Go home now! I will not have you disturbing the rest of the class! You have failed your test!"

"God, I was just laughing," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Don't be so rude!" snapped my teacher.

"Don't be so stupid," I said, standing up. "You're disrupting the class more than I did, bitch."

I started to walk out of the class, and then she shouted, "I hope your name gets called out for the Hunger Games later on."

A cold chill went down my spine, and I turned to stare at her. Our eyes met for like, ten minutes or something, and then I left, to go get ready to go out with my friends.


	2. Chapter 2- The Reaping

**Chapter Two**

I was doing my make-up and getting my clothes ready when my mother came in from work.

"Yustina! What are you doing home?" shouted Maw.

"I got kicked out of the test!" I shouted back.

Maw looked very disappointed, but I didn't really care. I'm her favourite kid, I know, because she had two kids before me, and then they moved out, and she said she was finished having kids, and she never wanted another one, and she couldn't wait to live out her older years in peace, but then I came along when she was forty-five, her little 'miracle' baby. She's never called me a miracle, but I know she thinks it.

"Yustina, you need to be more serious or else you'll never make it in the world," said Maw.

"Blah, blah, blah," I said, fixing my mascara. I honestly didn't give a shit, because she's really boring and serious, and she's also shit ugly with a horrible figure, so clearly I'm right and she's wrong.

"Yustina!" said Maw.

"Maw!" said Yustina(me!).

She put an arm around me, and said, "Yustina, I know this is probably a difficult day for you. You had that big test, and the Hunger Games. I understand. I went through the same thing when I was your age. But you need to deal with your emotions a bit better."

"Oh my God," I said. "Jesus Christ, I don't care about any of that, I'm just worried because I need more clothes, and you're a scabby bitch who won't buy me any. And also, you can NOT remember when you were my age, because you're like, a million years old with Alzheimer's or something."

"Yustina!" said Maw, looking really uncomfortable, because she's always self-conscious about her age, cause she's sixty and all my friends' mothers are only forty. "I don't have Alzheimer's. That's not very nice."

"Well, you're either stupid or you have Alzheimer's," I said, "Because you never bought me new clothes at the weekend, even though I TOLD you I wanted a new top. So which is it? Are you stupid or do you have Alzheimer's?"

Maw looked like she might cry. I didn't care.

"So are we going to this shit, or not?" I said, because I was finally ready, looking even more gorgeous than usual.

"OK," said Maw. "Don't worry, Yustina, they won't pick you. You'll be fine."

She's such a moanbag, she was more worried than me.

I just ignored her, and started walking outside to the American football stadium, where they call the names of the tributes.

We took a seat, and waited for the show to start.

This man was selling popcorn and hotdogs, so I made Maw buy me some. She wanted a hotdog, but I wanted two, so she didn't have enough money to get herself one.

I was eating my hotdog when the show began.

These cheerleaders ran across the stadium, jumping in the middle.

"D!" said one.

"I!" said another.

"S!" said the next one.

There was a pause, and then the next one said, "R!"

"I!" said a different one.

"C!" said the last one.

There was another pause.

"NINE!" they all cheered.

I laughed, because they spelled District 9 wrong, and then I remembered that I was meant to be the T!, because I'd won a competition last year when I got the raffle ticket to be the girl who shouts T!, but I'd forgotten, so they all looked like dopes. It was very funny.

Everyone in the stadium all started singing, "Olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé, olé!", and then we all chanted, "2, 4, 6, 8, who's the best, 9!"

It was such a fun moment, then Felificent Snooze walked to the middle of the pitch, holding a microphone and a big bag of doughnuts. All that woman ever seemed to do was eat and eat and eat.

"Hello, District 9," she said, and we all booed her, because we all love to sing and chant.

Someone threw a drink at her, and some Coke got in her hair, and we all cheered again.

She looked very angry. "I have to call the names of the District 9 tributes!" she screeched, and we just booed again. This happened every single year. We're always the last district to pick our tributes, because we spend so much time singing and booing and not listening to Felificent.

Someone started singing Olé again. This all went on literally three hours, I amn't even messing.

Finally, Felificent got to pull the names out from the scabby little hat we put our names in. I know some districts are classy, and put them into a bowl and stuff, but we just use the first drunk guy with a hat to pass out on the pitch, we just use his hat.

Felificent pulled out the first name. "Sonya Icon!"

I almost pissed myself laughing. That's my friend, Sonya, she was well going to die. But at least it'd be some quality TV, watching her run around an arena.

Felificent pulled out the second name. "Yustina Cest!"

Maw began crying beside me. No one was too surprised they'd called out two girls' names, because it happens most years. We just put all the names into one hat, instead of splitting them into two. We just keep calling out names till we get at least one boy and one girl, and then we just empty the hat on the pitch, and if there's too many girls, we put all the girls names into a hat, then the first one we pick is the tribute.

I wasn't really bothered about being called, because if I genuinely went to the Hunger Games, that would be good, because I'd well win, and also it would mean I could leave District 9, and everyone would forget about that stupid test.

"Tokyo Tanaka!" called Felificent.

My heart stopped, not literally like, cause then I'd be dead, but metaphorically. My boyfriend!

I was barely listening, and I didn't really know what was going on, until Maw said, "Yustina! You're going to the Hunger Games!" and I copped that my name must of got called again.

Maw looked shocked, but I had more important things to think about.

I was going to have to brutally murder my boyfriend, and then find another. Effort of that.


	3. Chapter 3- After the Reaping

**Chapter Three**

The anthem of Panem started playing in the loudspeakers. I hate the anthem, it's all boring like classical music. Everyone started booing again, and finally they changed the music to this rave music, so we all danced.

I danced while I was being escorted out by the Peacekeepers. Maw was crying.

They brought me to the changing rooms of the stadium. I sat in the girls' changing room, and Tokyo was in the boys'.

I was allowed to say goodbye to my friends and family here, before I left for the Capitol. I was so excited. I couldn't wait to leave District 9, and their stupid bread obsessions and stupid school tests.

Maw came to visit me first. "Yustina, honey, are you alright?" she asked me, hugging me.

"God, Maw, you better not make a show of me when I'm on the TV," I warned her. "Like seriously, I amn't even messing."

"Yustina, I love you," she cried, and I yawned. "Whatevs."

She was sobbing and whinging like a big baby, I mean, she's closer to death than birth, literally, and she's acting like that.

"Please piss off, Maw," I said. "Where's Paw?"

Paw is my paw. I hadn't seen him in years, because he spent all his time in work, earning money for the family. Maw works too, but I think she only worked part-time or something, because she was at home sometimes.

"Yustina, maybe now is the time I told you the truth," said Maw. "Paw died four years ago. I just couldn't bear to tell you, in case you got upset. I just pretended he was always working so you wouldn't be sad."

"Oh," I said. "Whatevs." I didn't like Paw too much, because he used to always tell me I had to work harder in school.

"Stop saying that!" Maw exclaimed. "I love you, Yustina, and you might DIE now! Do you understand how serious this all is?"

"Yes, I do!" I shouted back at her. "Maw, I'm going in to the Hunger Games with Tokyo, and he's the love of my life! I might be able to leave him alive till the end, but at the end, when it's just me and him, I will have to kill him, and how do you think I feel about that?"

"You think you'll win?" asked Maw, really quietly.

"Yeah," I said. "I'm so pretty and smart and strong and fast, who would NOT want me to win?"

Maw hugged me again. "I love you, Yustina."

"Stop saying that, Maw, or I'll beat you around," I said, and she let go of me, looking scared. "Just joking!" I said, quickly, cause that would probably damage my public image.

"Leave now, Maw," I told her, and she left, still whinging. What a moanbag.

The next person who came to visit me was Sonya. "Haha, I'm going to be famous," I said to her, and she looked really angry.

"I was going to fucking volunteer," she said, "Because they called out my name first, but we aren't even a career district, which means you're going to die, and it would have been really stupid to do."

"You think I'm going to die?" I laughed. "You just wish you could die, the state of your horrible giant nose. And your car is a piece of shit. And I fucked your boyfriend."

I was only messing about the last bit, but Sonya's face got even angrier.

"You fucking slapper," she spat at me, and then she kept spitting on me.

I grabbed her hair, and beat her head off the floor seven times. She was crying at the end, and I'd say she probably got a concussion too. "Don't fuck with me," I hissed, wishing I was being filmed, just to show everyone how tough I was.

We both hugged each other then. "I'll miss you, bitch," said Sonya.

"See ya, whore," I said, as she left.

Best friends. What would you do without them?

My big brother and sister came in next, and they were boring, trying to give me all this crap advice. "Listen," I said, interrupting one of them, I don't even know the difference between them. "Does my face look like it's in the middle of giving a fuck?"

They left very soon after that.

My teacher was the last person to visit.

"You fucking cow," I snarled. "You're the bleeding reason I've had to listen to all my family and friends moan at me about how they'll miss me when I'm in the Hunger Games! You jinxed me, you ugly, fat bitch!"

My teacher said nothing, she just moved her head real creepy, and blinked once. Then she left.

I didn't care. The only person I wanted to see was going into the Games with me. Tokyo Tanaka, why did fate make life happen like this?


	4. Chapter 4- Dinner

**Chapter Four**

We had to leave District 9 that night, after we got a few photos taken. I was so glad when we left. The people of District 9 all waved at us when we got on the train, and they did a Mexican wave to say goodbye to us. I was so embarrassed.

I didn't look at Tokyo, the love of my life. How could I, when I was already planning to murder him, and then eat his remains?

It was either him or me, and I picked me.

We got dinner on the train, and I was so happy cause I was starving. The food was delicious, a buffet that we could pick millions of stuff from, chicken and pork and ham and beef and salmon and duck and goose and turkey and corned beef and prawns and cod and burgers(with gravy, without bread), and vegetables and baby potatoes and chipper chips and skinny chips and rice and pasta and spaghetti and lasagne and onion rings and potato wedges and mockingjay stew, and loads of sauces, and hotdogs and burgers(without gravy, with bread), and chicken wings and bread and loads of types of pizza and barbeque sauce and mushroom balls and chicken balls and burgers(without gravy, without bread, with batter) and cheese and noodles and ribs and baked potatoes and potatoes with cheese and mashed potatoes and rashers and sausages, and burgers(without gravy, with bread, with batter[they're called wurly burgers, I had four]), and it was delicious and I ate it all.

Tokyo didn't eat as much, he didn't even finish his chicken and chips, so I finished it for him, and then I went back up for a bit more duck.

I could feel the vomit rising in my throat, not because the food was disgusting or gone off or anything, it was because I'd just had too much, but I was determined to keep it down till it came out the other end.

Then we got some deserts, and I had a slice of apple pie, a brownie, three scoops of chocolate ice cream, a scoop of vanilla ice cream, three slices of cheesecake(lemon, chocolate and strawberry), some trifle, a huge helping of chocolate and vanilla mouse, and a cupcake with icing on the top that said, 'Good luck in the Games!' so I thought that was lucky.

It was delicious, and because Tokyo didn't eat his slice of apple pie, I finished that off too.

Some people might think I'm a greedy bitch, but I'm really not.

"Now that you're finished eating, you might want to meet your mentor," said Felificent. Beside her, our mentor's mouth hung open as he stared at me. Possibly because I have a giant pair of boobs.

I laughed. "I don't need a mentor. Especially not a little ugly skinny midget like you."

He was so skinny and dwarfy, it was hilarious, I would be mortified if he'd beaten me in the Games, because he's only as tall as my hips, literally. Hilarious.

"How dare you," he said, as he took a sip of his milkshake, and I frowned, because I hadn't known there was any milkshake.

"You are, though," I said. "I don't need a mentor. I can do this myself."

"Do you understand how dangerous this is?" he demanded.

"Yes," said Tokyo.

"Shut up, Tokyo," I said. "Stupid little Japanese bastard."

"I'm not Japanese!" he said. "I'm Chuvash!"

"Yeah right," I said. "You've got Chinese eyes, and you're called bleeding Tokyo. Of course you're Japanese. Don't be racist."

"Stop fighting," said our mentor. "I will teach you martial arts. It could help you in close combat."

"No thanks," I said. "I'll be grand."

"What skills do you have?" he demanded.

I was ready for this question. "I'm beautiful and kind and intelligent and fast and strong and gorgeous…lots of stuff. I'm going to win."

Felificent, Tokyo and the mentor all laughed. I just ignored them.

"My name is Hanky Dog," said our mentor. I didn't care.

"The recap of the day's reapings is about to come on!" said Felificent, excitedly. She's hideous looking, like a midget toad, and that's just the shape of her body. Her head is more like a cat or something, and not even a cute little kitten or anything, I mean literally a deformed cat with six eyes and lots of hair and bald spots.

She turned on the TV, so we could watch ourselves.

Tokyo was shit-scared, nearly crying watching the screen, I was real brave. I didn't like watching the tributes from the first eight districts, because they were all hideous and made my eyes nearly bleed, and also I just wanted to see me.

When I finally came on, I almost died with embarrassment. I'd spilled ketchup and mustard on my face, and I was walking around with sauce on my face. I looked like a custard man who'd murdered someone or something.

The voiceover said, "This is District 9, who produce grain. The male is Tokyo Tanaka, the female is Yustina Cest, who can be seen with food all over her face."

The studio audience watching the show live all laughed, and I nearly started crying.

"What a bold fashion statement," said the voiceover, all sarcastically like a gobshite, and I wanted to kick his miniscule dick and also his face and teeth too.

"The bastard!" I screeched.

"District 9 has only ever had one winner, Hanky Dog, who won the Games eighteen years ago thanks to his extreme martial art skills."

They moved on to stupid District 10.

"How could they make such a show of me?" I asked, almost crying. I could feel a belch in my chest.

"You really should have cleaned your face before going on TV," said Felificent, very unhelpfully because if I could go bleeding back in time I obviously would.

"I'm not going on the Hunger Games," I said. "They'll all laugh at me."

"They'll kill you if you don't," warned Hanky.

"Let them," I said. "I'd rather die than live in a world where they can talk about me on TV like that."

A photographer walked in, to take a snapshot of the District 9 team chatting for the publicity yolks, just as I belched. Unfortunately, it was more like the mouth version of a shart. It wasn't a belch, because I threw up my dinner all over the table, and all over Felificent, Hanky and Tokyo.

I heard the click of the camera as I vomited, and I wanted to die again.

On the table, in the middle of the sick was the icing off a cupcake, that I'd obviously just swallowed whole.

_Good luck in the Games._

_[AN- By the way, I amn't racist, Yustina is, but I'm just trying to show how obsessed with bread District 9 is, that they don't teach Geography in schools, so she's not racist either just ignorant cause of the Panem oppression and that._

_Also, I amn't updating till I get 30 reviews, so start reviewing people! Don't just enjoy the story in silence!]_


	5. Chapter 5- Costumes

**Chapter Five**

They wanted to train us for the Games, but I said no fucking way, and just spent the days watching TV instead. Hanky tried to convince me to train, but I told him I was already talented enough.

I said, "Look at me, doing a magic trick."

Hanky watched me as I stuck up my middle finger at him. "Now go away."

Hanky ran off. I didn't know why, but I was like a million percent sure that Hanky was scared of me.

Tokyo came into the room, and he was all hot and sweaty, like a body builder.

"I think I'm getting good at martial arts," he said, all proud of himself. I walked over, and started licking his chest(he wasn't wearing a top, just a pair of speedos) and then I licked down his belly, into his bellybutton(he has an innie) and then I spat out the fluff, and then I gave him a blow job.

Felificent walked in. "Oh my god, what is going on?"

Tokyo was naked, his speedos around his ankles, and his dick only covered up by my mouth. "What?" I said, my voice all muffled cause of the huge giant dick in it.

"This is very inappropriate!" said Felificent. "My children are sitting right behind you!"

Her two ugly brats were sitting on the chair behind me, facing Tokyo, their mouths open wide in horror. They were the most boring kids ever, they didn't even talk to me when we were watching TV together. Maybe they'll be traumatized and get interesting? One can only hope.

"Whatevs," I said, sucking one last time, before sitting back on my seat and staring at the TV.

Felificent still looked annoyed, but whatevs. She said, "I have good news for you, Yustina. You get to meet your stylist today."

"Whatevs," I said. I heard this person say it on TV, and I thought it was a good expression, and it really matches my mood at the moment, which is kind of a 'whatevs' sort of mood. I don't give a fuck if you don't understand what that means, literally whatevs you stupid bitches.

Then I copped what stupid Felificent had said. "Oh my god, are you trying to say my clothes aren't nice or something? You fucking cow, it's not my fault I have a sick mother who can't buy me nice clothes cause she's got a fucking MESSED UP BRAIN."

"Is she alright?" asked Felificent, all concerned. Whatevs.

"No, she's got fucking Alzheimer's or something, cause she's so old," I explained. "And anyway, my clothes are great. I have great taste. Just not at the moment, cause I'm having a lazy day. Ever hear of that?"

I was wearing my bikini, because District 9 is nowhere near the ocean, so I'd never gotten to wear it before. Also, the Capitol is nowhere near the ocean, but I figured I was on my holidays, so I had to wear a bikini. It was a traditional District 9 one, with the boobs and the crotch in the shape of a doughnut or a bagel or a pumpernickel(lol!) or something.

"I- I-" said Felificent.

"And also, Felificent, you're an ugly bitch," I finished. "You dress weird and you look weird and your make-up's weird, you're just a ugly bleeding bitch, so shut up, and don't slag off my clothes again, or I'll fucking shoot out your kneecaps."

Felificent looked like she might cry. Whatevs.

Tokyo tried to be nice, but honestly, I just want a boyfriend who's a bastard, like one on the TV or something. If he didn't have such a great body, great hair and a great dick, I would definitely leave him. "Don't cry, Felificent," he said.

"Shut up, Tokyo," I said.

Felificent said, "This is your stylist now."

The stylist walked into the room, and oh my bleeding god, he is the gayest fecking man I've ever seen, and Jesus fucking Christ, I'm so unlucky cause he's also the sexist man I've ever seen(except for you Tokyo!).

My heart was pounding and breaking at the same time, for I knew our relationship never could be, because he was gay. (Although my mind was racing, thinking about having a threesome with him and Tokyo).

"Bonjour, mademoiselle," he said. He's French! They are even gayer than the other countries! Panem is a straight country, but France is gay gay gay.

"I will be your, how you say, stylist," he said. "Tu will wear this for your, how you say, debut television appearance."

I had to get into this yolk called a chariot, and see the other tributes. I hated them all already, and I hoped they died. That made me happy, because this is like one of the only times that you don't get in trouble for saying you hope everyone else in the room dies.

The gay gay gay stylist pulled out a giant costume from behind his back. It was a baguette.

I was not amused.

"I am not wearing that piece of shit," I said.

Tokyo said, "That's a baguette. Shit is a darker brown."

"Thank you, Tokyo," I said, very sarcastically, but I think the sarcasm was lost, because he looked really happy like a puppy, and he said, "You're very welcome, Yustina."

We were both dressed like matching baguettes for the night, and we were going to look ridiculous. District 1 always look great, and so does District 2, and 3, and 4, and 5, and 6, and 7, and 8, and 10, and 12, while we dress up like fecking slices of bread, or, in exciting years, a sandwich. One year, we all sat around the TV, excitedly when this girl was dressed up like a croissant with some chocolate in it(in reality, she'd just been so scared she shit herself but we didn't know that at the time[also, she died like the first day]). I was not looking stupid.

"I want to wear a sexy dress," I said.

"How you say, tough," said the stylist.

"Whatevs," I said. I dressed up in the costume to show everyone how I looked.

No one said I looked nice. Jesus, I wonder why.

"Are you excited to be going on TV?" asked Felificent.

"Open wide," I said to her, then I spat in her mouth. I used to do that to Maw all the time.

It was almost time for me to go out on stage. They decorated my hair like grains of wheat, and Tokyo's hair was done up like a slice of brown bread.

"Who looks better, Hanky?" I asked. "Me or Felificent the ugly bitch?"

Hanky pretended he didn't hear me, so I picked up a glass from the table and threw it at his head. He started to cry when it smashed, and blood started going down his head. What a stupid little whingebag. He fell on the ground, his eyes shut, and Tokyo said, "Oh my god!" Felificent the ugly bitch ran over to him, as blood started coming out of his ears, and so did my gay stylist, which was actually very inconsiderate cause my lipstick wasn't even finished or anything.

"Fine!" I shouted. "I'll do my own lipstick!"

This man with a clipboard ran into the room, and said, "District 9, are you ready to go out!"

He left very quickly, and I took Tokyo's hand, and marched him out of the dressing room. Our chariot was waiting at the end of the corridor, and we got into it.

"How do I look, Tokyo?" I asked.

"Do you think Hanky is okay?" he asked.

I thought that was a bit of a bastard boyfriend thing to do, ignore my serious concerns for something trivial, so I was really turned on, and I said a little prayer to the big man in the sky for not making me a boy, cause if I was a boy, I would have gone out on TV with a giant bleeding erection, lol!

"Thanks, Chris Hadfield," I whispered.

The chariot was moving, and we went through these doors outside. I suddenly noticed these other chariots, with the other tributes. I'm not being arrogant or anything, but me and Tokyo were the sexiest pair.

I began to wave at the people in the crowd, because I know they will love me in the games.


	6. Chapter 6- Interviews

Thank you for your review, Radio Free Death.

**Chapter 6**

We went around in a circle outside for a bit, and then I got bored, because the crowd just cheered. They didn't sing anything, or shout, or throw things, or riot, which really disappointed me, cause it just shows that District 9 is the best and the Capitol is a big smelly pile of onions.

I sat down on the chariot, and sexy sexy Tokyo said, "Don't give me a blowjob now, Yustina, everyone's watching!"

"Oh my god," I said. "Is that all you men ever think about? Sex all the time? It's disgusting."

"Sorry Yustina," said Tokyo.

Except now I kind of did want to give him a blowjob. If he was a good bastard boyfriend, he would have just stuck that dick in my mouth. Oh my god, I just hated him! What did I deserve to get a wimpy boyfriend like him?

We were finished going around the arena, now, thank God. We went back inside and the TV people running the show said, "Follow us, you'll be brought onto TV in order of your District. We're doing boys first, then girls."

The smelly bastard from District One got to go on TV first to talk to the host of the show, Caesar Milan, or something, I don't really give a fuck.

I looked at the girl from District Twelve, and then I went over and punched her in the stomach. "Haha, bitch, you have to go last!" I said.

She started to cry.

I said, "You're going to lose the Hunger Games! You're a wimp!"

Then I walked away, all happy with myself, and I said to Tokyo, "Let's go have sex to kill the time."

Tokyo said, "OK."

"Jesus," I said. "Don't sound so excited. God, you are obsessed with sex."

We went to the corner, and we did each other until District 8 was on TV, then we quickly got dressed up in our stupid baguette costumes again.

"You know what," I said. "It should be ladies first. I'm going to go out first. You can wait."

"But- but- we were told-" said Tokyo.

"Don't care!" I shouted.

A clipboard person came in, and called, "Tokyo Tanaka! District 9!"

I walked forward, and walked out on stage.

Caesar Milan said, "Welcome to the show, Tokyo!"

I said, "Are you thick in the head or blind or something? Do I look like I'm called Tokyo? Or a man? No. So therefore, I'm not bleeding Tokyo."

Caesar laughed nervously. "So who are you?"

"You don't even know who I am?" I snorted, in disbelief. "I'm Yustina Cest. District 9 female tribute. Very unprofessional that yous don't even know that."

"Well it was supposed to be male tributes first," Caesar said, and the crowd cheered.

"We hate Yustina!" these shitbags started chanting.

"Yeah, and fuck you too!" I shouted back.

"District 9 always die the first day!" shouted some asshole.

"At least we fucking enter the games!" I screamed back. "You Capitol assholes are too chicken!"

I started making a chicken noise at them, and they started shouting back at me.

"Control your audience, Caesar Milan," I ordered.

Caesar said, "My name is Caesar Flickerman. Caesar Milan is the dog whisperer." The audience all laughed.

"Well, your audience is a pack of bitches!" I said, which was actually very clever, cause a girl dog is called a bitch, and a bitch is a mean word for people who are assholes.

"Let's try and have a real discussion," Caesar said. "Tokyo is your boyfriend, isn't he? How do you feel about going into the games with him? Heartbroken?"

"Devastated," I said. "I will miss his beautiful smile, his sweet eyes, and his giant dick."

Caesar opened his mouth and closed it again, like seventeen times. "So you don't think he'll win?" he asked.

"He's a fucking wimp!" I laughed. "And even if he makes it to the end with me, I'd kill him. I mean, I don't want to die!"

The audience started booing me again, and I just stuck up my middle finger. "You're all jealous bitches cause I'm going to be famous, and you'll all be nobodies forever. You aren't even on TV right now! I am!"

The booing got even louder, and the security had to lead me off the stage, which was so funny. I sat in a room with all the other tributes who'd gone on, and I watched Tokyo on the stage. It took a few minutes for the audience to calm down after me.

"And now, this is the real Tokyo Tanaka!" called Caesar Milan.

Tokyo waved nervously. "Hi Caesar," he said, very quietly.

"Jaysus, Tokyo, speak up, you're making a show of me," I muttered, watching.

"So Yustina's your girlfriend?" asked Caesar.

"Yes," he whispered.

I started banging my head against the wall. He didn't know how to work the audience at all. It was so embarrassing. I knew my friend Sonya would be pissing herself laughing back in District 9, cause she always fancied Tokyo, and she was so jealous I got him. To be honest, I only started dating him cause she fancied him.

"And how do you feel about going into the Games with her?" Caesar asked.

"Sad," said Tokyo. "I just love her so much. I wish she didn't have to go in with me."

The audience all went, "Awww," and I rolled my eyes.

Someone shouted, "Dump her! She's a bitch!"

"That's it," I snarled, and I marched back onto the stage. I started swearing and shouting at the audience again, and the security had to pull me off the stage. "Yous are all just racist cause I'm Chuvash and he's Japanese or something, so we're interracial! You fucking racist shitbags!"

Tokyo said, "I'm Chuvash too. Stop being mean, please, Yustina."

"No you aren't you dickhead!" I screamed, and the audience started up a chant. "Dump Yustina, dump Yustina, dump Yustina!"

"I'm pregnant!" I scream. "And it's not even your baby, you cocksucker!"

The security finally got me off the camera, and I was put into a little cell room where I was to 'calm down'. I don't know why, I bet I'm great TV.

I couldn't wait to win the Hunger Games, and piss them all off.


	7. Chapter 7- Just Before the Games

_Hmmmm, thank you for your reviews, Guest. I find it a bit rude the way you liked my story the first time you read it, and now you've just written a review and said it was bad. I don't know why you'd do that._

_I'd like to apologize to all my fans for waiting over a year to update my story. It will all be worth it, I promise you!_

_Anyway, this chapter is dedicated to you, Guest._

I wasn't really pregnant, that was just a joke, but when I saw Tokyo's face, I decided to keep it up for as long as possible, which I guess would be nine months.

Backstage, they were really annoying and they told me to stop shouting and to calm down.

I didn't want to calm down, especially not when a load of security guards and Felificent and Hanky were the ones telling me to do it. So I stayed quiet for a minute, just to trick them.

They all seemed to relax, and then, when they were all off guard, I screamed as loud as I could. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

It ripped my vocal chords, I think, but it was worth it, because they all jumped and put their hands over their ears. Seeing them all so stressed out calmed me down, and finally, after maybe like a million hours, they finally let me get back to my room, where I chilled out and watched some TV.

The days went by and I spent my time watching quality TV shows. I learnt what life was like in the past, when people lived in places like 'Jersey Shore' and visited wise men like Mr Maury and Mr Springer to find out family secrets. Omg, people in the past are gobshites, and I am so glad I am a sophisticated modern woman.

It was the last night before I entered the Games that I scratched my arse and found some toilet paper still stuck there. It was white and kind of chocolatey brown, but it was the white colour that was important. The toilet paper in the Capitol was all purple. That meant this toilet paper had come from District 9. It was my last link to my home, and my friends and my stupid bitchy Maw.

I felt kind of sentimental, which is a bit stupid, but omg I apologize for having a HEART okay? I clutched the toilet paper to my chest and this little tear came out of my eye, because I remembered the photo on the bathroom wall of me and Tokyo holding a stuffed teddy that I used to look at whenever I was doing a shite or peeing. Me and Tokyo had visited the funfair, where this little girl won a teddy bear when she threw some ball at a pile of cups and knocked it down. She was so happy, because she was shit poor and she'd never had a teddy before. But I wanted the teddy, so when Tokyo wasn't looking, I kicked the girl in the leg and knocked her over. She started crying and I robbed her teddy, and then we took that photo, in what was possibly my happiest moment. Some bread flavoured candy floss was in my hand, and Tokyo was making his hottest face, where his eyes are slightly crossed and his tongue kind of curly looking.

The door opened, and Hanky came in, looking scared like a little mouse if there was a tiger holding a machine gun in front of him, and also they were both strapped to bombs and had no food. "Yustina?"

I jumped and threw the toilet paper into the air. "I'm not hugging anything or crying anything you stupid little prick and if you tell anyone I was, I will bite off your fingers, toes, tongue and dick when you are sleeping." I actually would do that too, because I have always wondered what that sensation would feel like- the bones snapping under my teeth, my mouth exploding with warm blood.

"I didn't see anything!" Hanky squeaked, like a little mouse who was about to get his fingers, toes, tongue and dick bitten off by a sexy sexy woman with a smoking hot body. "I just wanted to tell you that you need to be up early to enter the Games."

"OK who died and made you boss?" I asked.

"I'm just trying to help," said Hanky.

"Don't care," I said. "I'm watching TV. Leave me alone or else."

So Hanky left the room, looking all scared. I went back to watching the new programme I'd discovered- Breaking Bad, which is really good, and highly recommended by me.

It was about nine o'clock the next morning when there was another knock on the door.

"The fuck is it?" I called, politely.

"Felificent," said some whiny voice from outside. "We need you out here. You're going into the Games today."

"Make me!" I said, which did not go down well.

The door opened, and Felificent came in with three big muscular guys who you would think were either security guards or male strippers. You honestly would not be sure, especially if you were really tired, because you'd stayed up all night watching Breaking Bad.

I started clapping, because I didn't have music, and I wanted them to dance for me. I didn't have any money on me, but in between clapping, I found a chocolate bar wrapper in my pocket, so I waved that at the tallest one. "Take off your clothes and I might just stick this in your ass crack," I said, really temptingly.

They all just stared at me. "What?" said the tall one, bending his head sidewards like a confused dog who needed Caesar Flickerman to train him.

"That's what strippers do on TV," I said. "I just don't have money."

"Well isn't that the point?" said the stripper with the curly hair. "They don't just want things in their asses, they want money."

I don't like when guys are smart as well as good looking, cause it makes me feel like a bimbo, which I am NOT. "Dance!" I shouted. "Dance, dance, dance, dance, dance!"

"I told you she was a difficult tribute," muttered Felificent.

"You're just jealous because nobody would ever pay you to strip for them," I said.

"Nobody's paying us either," hinted the curly haired stripper.

"I don't have any bleeding money," I said. "If I did, I'd have got my tramp stamp by now."

"This is ridiculous," said the last stripper. "Get out of bed, put on your clothes, and get ready for the arena."

"What's it like being the ugliest stripper?" I asked, and then he took out a gun and pointed it at me.

I held up my own hands like a gun, fingers pointed out. "If you shoot, I shoot," I said, trying to sound threatening. I just hoped he didn't notice that I didn't actually have a gun.

He did. "You don't have a gun," he said. "You have ten seconds to get out of the bed."

I had no more options, which made me so mad I wanted to rip all the teeth out of his head and shove them up his arse, but instead, I had to get ready for the stupid Games. That gay French guy dressed me up, and I wasn't allowed to say anything, because if I did, the stupid ugly stripper would shoot me and I didn't want to get shot. I hated him. Also, I hated Felificent, because I knew it was her fault they'd come.

And then finally, after the most boring few hours of my life, where I literally couldn't even see Tokyo because they said he'd be a distraction, I was put into some weird tube yolk, and then that was it, I was in the Games I guess.

The first thing I noticed was the cold. It felt like someone had stuck me into a giant ice-cream. I wondered if the snowy, blistering cold was edible.

There were other tributes standing near me, and I knew we all needed to go find weapons, but to be honest, I wasn't arsed, because I had my teeth. My plan was to sharpen my teeth like knives, and then just bite everyone to death. So while everyone else all ran to fight it out for weapons, I walked off, with Tokyo following behind me, the cold making us cold.

The Games had begun. Obviously, seriously, if you needed me to tell you that, you're a dope.


End file.
